After weeks of loathing South London and all of its godforsaken boroughs of hell, I was just starting to admire central London as we approached a lovely view of the Houses of Parliament.
Then this old sonofabitch who smelled like booze, has long hair and a long beard and long fingernails, and basically looks like a hobo, ruined my moment by parking his crusty ass right next to me. I mean, maybe he’s just a hip old guy who thinks it’s cool to look like that and plays a lot of classical guitar. But nonetheless, why do people do this? Why do people get all cozy up on you when there are empty seats everywhere? I even had to move my bag, which I was using to occupy the empty seat next to mine to illustrate to the bus that I do not like strangers cozying up to me in my space.
Yes, he walks with a cane. Yes, I was sitting in a priority seat for disabled people. Yes, I am not disabled.
But you know what? Let me get one thing straight here: There was an empty priority seat in front of me, closer to the door, and another two empty priority seats behind me. I don’t care if he walks with a stupid cane. If he really “needs” a priority seat, there were three other options besides the one in my space.
I wouldn’t have even minded it if he got all territorial and told me to get up so he could sit down because I am selfish and lazy and not disabled. If he had given me a chance, I would have gotten up and sat in some other seat outside of the priority area altogether, and then everybody would win.
He completely ruined my bus ride.
*Photos from The People’s Forum and Mama Pop.






Maybe he’s just an old bastard tired of youths sitting in the disabled/old people section and this is how he retaliates. By making you uncomfortable.